Steve Greydanus noodles the DC/Marvel movie universes

He writes:

So Warner/DC is planning to introduce a veteran, established Batman in the DC cinematic universe established in MAN OF STEEL.

Meanwhile, Disney/Marvel, which just closed a deal with Sony to allow Spider-Man to appear in Marvel Cinematic Universe movies (though Sony will still retain film rights to Spider-Man), is planning on introducing the MCU version of Spider-Man as a teenager in high school.

This strikes me as a mistake on both counts. The two studios have their wires crossed. The new Batman should be a novice, the new Spider-Man a veteran, not vice versa.

Veteran Batman makes no sense in the world of MAN OF STEEL. Watching that film, it’s obvious they intended Superman to be the first superhero, and the inspiration for the others. There’s just no Batman in that world.

I mean, if Clark Kent has grown up in a world with costumed crazies periodically threatening to turn major urban centers into graveyards and so forth, and other guys in costumes — without even any superpowers — putting it all on the line to fight the bad guys and defend society, it’s hard to understand why he’s spent all this time wandering about doing odd jobs and happening to save a few random people here and there anonymously when opportunities presented themselves.

In short, I have a hard time rethinking the first 90 minutes of MAN OF STEEL and imagining to myself, “And meanwhile, while Clark was working in a truck-stop diner, Batman was trying to stop KGBeast from detonating a nuclear bomb the size and shape of a baseball in downtown Gotham.” (Or whatever.)

OTOH, Young Spider-Man has been done to death over the last dozen years. People are sick of it. We’ve had his origin story twice, his first encounters with the Green Goblin twice, his high-school graduation twice. Giving us a veteran Spider-Man would be a nice change of pace, and would gloss nicely over skipping the origin story.

Of course you’d have to retcon his absence during major MCU events like THE AVENGERS…and gesture toward a past career we haven’t seen, but which might be not unlike the movies to date.

But this would be comparatively easy to do. ‘

You could even do it with humor.

Here’s how it might go down:

Iron Man: “So, wallflower. Where were you that time the Chitauri were attacking earth and the feds nearly dropped a nuke on Manhattan?”

Spidey (defensively): “I was out of town that day! Hey, where were YOU when Doc Ock nearly blew up New York?”

Iron Man: “China. I get around. Good job protecting New York when the Hulk and his evil twin were leveling Harlem, by the way.”

Spidey: “You know, some of us take the subway when we aren’t suited up! We don’t all have limos and helicopters and…things.”

Iron Man: “Speaking of all my things — I do have to thank you for exposing the CEO of Oscorp as a psychotic flying troll. My stock went up nine percent that day.”

Etc. WDYT?

I agree. And I love your scene! Here’s some more dialogue:

Spidey: Stock. I’ve heard of that. Course, I was raised in Queens and my Uncle Ben didn’t have time to play the market cuz he was too busy working and raising me.

IM: Oh goody. Working class hero.

Spidey: Working class *super*hero to you, bub. The only thing super about you is your superego. Freud would have a field day with that overgrown codpiece of a suit you built.

IM: Learned a lot in community college, I see.

We should collaborate on something sometime! Could be fun!

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